Do I Need Therapy in the New Year?
If you have been asking yourself "Do I need therapy?" you are not alone. To close out a tough year, Em and Jen talk about what "needing" therapy actually means, why you do not have to be in crisis to start, and the fears that keep people on the fence (or make them want to quit).
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In this episode
- Anti-resolutions: what you are done doing, instead of what you should start
- Feeling lost or stuck is a valid reason to go to therapy, no crisis required
- A therapist helps untangle your thoughts without the bias friends and family bring
- Taking a break from therapy vs. avoiding something hard
- Crying in therapy is normal, and you will still be able to compartmentalize afterward
- How to approach the overwhelm of choosing a therapist
You do not need a crisis
Em and Jen acknowledge that many people are feeling the weight of uncertainty, job changes, and rising costs, and some are questioning whether therapy is worth it. They push back on the idea that therapy is only for emergencies. One listener's long-held job is ending and they do not know which direction to go. Another feels stuck with no specific problem. Both are exactly what therapy is for.
The hosts describe therapy as untangling a knotted ball of thoughts. Friends and family can help, but they bring their own perspectives. A therapist can help you sort out your values and what is right for you, not for them.
Taking a break vs. running away
The word "need" can make therapy sound like a crisis service. A more useful question is when you want to pause. Stepping back after real progress is different from leaving because sessions are getting close to something painful. Even avoidance is okay to name: telling your therapist "I want to avoid this for a while" can be part of the work. Good therapists hold space for clients to come and go.
Fear of crying, and of feeling worse
Tears are common in therapy, and therapists keep plenty of tissues on hand. For the listener who has "no time to feel worse," the hosts gently suggest that is a sign of running on autopilot. They encourage asking, "What is the cost of not having this release?" Many first-time clients say they leave feeling lighter. And if you have been compartmentalizing for years, you will not lose that skill: "You're going to be able to compartmentalize" when you walk back out the door.
For therapists and for picking a therapist
Em and Jen believe therapists should have their own therapy plus regular case consultation or supervision. A consultation is usually a one-time ask about a specific issue, while personal therapy is for what your clients stir up in you. They also validate how overwhelming it is to choose a therapist, noting that fit matters and that it can take a few tries to find the right one.
Video chapters
- 4:00 Anti-resolutions for the new year
- 7:30 Why this year made therapy feel harder to access
- 8:40 Feeling lost after a job ends
- 12:02 Needing therapy vs. taking a break
- 14:20 "I'm scared I'll cry the whole time"
- 15:02 Worried therapy will make you feel worse
- 18:40 Therapists: consultation, supervision, or your own therapy?
- 21:30 Stuck without a specific problem
- 24:02 Overwhelmed by choosing a therapist
Frequently asked questions
How do I know if I need therapy?
If you feel stuck, lost, overwhelmed, or disconnected and have not been able to shift it on your own, therapy can help. You do not need a crisis or a specific problem to start.
Is it normal to cry in therapy?
Yes. Crying is common and often a sign you are getting to something important. Many people leave early sessions feeling lighter, and you can talk with your therapist about ways to settle before you leave.
Is it okay to take a break from therapy?
Yes. Breaks can be healthy, especially after meaningful progress. It helps to talk with your therapist about whether you are pausing because things are going well or avoiding something difficult.
Want support with this?
Em and Jen founded The Therapy Group, a relational therapy practice offering in-person therapy in Philadelphia and West Chester, PA, plus virtual sessions. Our team personally matches you with a therapist who fits what you are working on, for individuals, couples, and families.
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ShrinkChicks is for education and entertainment and is not a substitute for therapy or medical advice. If you are in crisis in the U.S., call or text 988 to reach the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline.